Growing up as a boy and then transitioning genders during my adulthood was not easy, although it was not the worst. I grew up always having an anal focused sexuality (never liked using my frontal tool) but it’s was very confusing specially during my teens as many times I thought I was a gay male.
After many, many sessions of therapy I started understanding myself and my desires, so I began transitioning genders, which is a whole ordeal.
There’s also the issues with prejudice even inside the LGBTQIA+ community which is not the best. And being an AO lesbian transwoman, althought it has it’s perks, it also comes with a whole lot of issues as some lesbians will shut any opening down (tu dum psss) when you say you’re trans. Thankfully I had very good experiences with most of the girls and they seem mostly understanding and accepting of trans people.
I ended finding the most amazing woman amongst them which somehow I managed to marry! Sometimes I just wonder how luck I am. Regarding the sex we take turns topping each other anally with strapons and my thingy is never touched, I only use it sometimes for solo pleasure because it’s easy. She loves to receive oral but no vaginal penetration has been done for the last 8 years.
Well, that’s my history and I stick to it.
I’m a nice girl (most time), so feel free to have a chat with me.
Stories like yours actually sort of mess with my mind.
So you were a boy. But You didn’t want sex or relationships with boys ? And then you found out you wanted to be a woman. But not because you’re attracted to men ?
But you do use the tool of a man to have sex with. Then, and this is a genuine question, why not let a man fuck you ? What’s the difference ?
First thing that you need to understand is that gender and sexuality are different things. Being cis/trans and straight/homo have nothing to do with each other, but the yes it make sit hard to understand yourself growing up because of how binary society is. I’m just a lesbian simple as that, some lesbians like cock shaped dildos even if they don’t feel attracted to men, just as straight men can use dildos without feeling attracted to men. You don’t have to like men to like cocks. I know it sounds silly not using my own but then using a strap on on my wife, its just what makes me comfortable during sex. My own erections make me dysphoric which is a whole other subject.
And it’s not a matter of wanting to be a women. I always felt I was a woman since very young but I didn’t understand what was that feeling because of lack of guidance and knowledge. You grow up swing mostly men and women having relationships, you think that’s the only option, but after a while you learn some women like other women, then a whoooole new world opens up. But while you’re learning that you’re confused by how you feel pleasure because that’s the way mostly just gay men have sex, so that’s another layer of confusion. Took me 10 years of therapy to wrap my head around myself, who I am and what I want. Yes it’s is confusing and mind bending. But at least now I’m happy.
Thank for taking time to explain it. Cause for me life has (at least on relations, don’t get me started on social matters) been straight foreward, with the exception that I’ve known for decades that I would gladly decline vaginal sex in favor for anal sex. But only with a women who has a functional vagina. The whole appeal is that my wife chooses to have her asshole fucked over her - perfectly usable - vagina.
I have never felt any need to be penetrated myself. I want to be the one doing the penetrating.
That’s a perfectly acceptable reason for likeing AO. It has has same appeal for me towards my wife. She finds extremely arousing that I could use my own flesh tool to fuck her, but we choose not to. She also loves that I can orgasm from anal as much as her withou touching myself. There’s many ways of seeing the same thing. Everyone to their on.
It’s a pleasure explaining all. Great subject that’s being a huge part of myself since always.
And for men like me it’s not simple to even get this kind of info. I have a trans woman as a customer, but then suddenly she impregnaged her girlfriend and now they have a baby. That’s very confusing, you know ?
Lol! That’s amazing! But not confusing at all. Not all trans women are sterile and can impregnate cis women normally. I am though. No swimmers at all. Hormonal therapy for trans women makes us sterile sometimes but not always.
Just as a cis dominant woman can top anyone without wanting being a man. If you’re referring to using her real member, the thing is that dysphoria hits different for each trans person. She probably has not a single issue using her own cock like I do.
I’m certainly no expert, but just as there is a distinction between gender and sexuality, there’s a difference between biological sex (the physical equipment, so to speak) and gender (a social construct characterized by culturally based behaviors, expectations, etc.) And these categories allow for degrees. So a person born with a vagina might nevertheless identify as a man, in the sense that they identify with many of the cultural signifiers of being a man, while still enjoying the biological equipment they were born with. While others might identify as a man and strongly desire the physical equipment to match. Different strokes for different folks.
That’s exactly it. And if you insert genetic and hormonal medical conditions that alter gender expression at a biological level things get even more complex.
… just as straight men can use dildos without feeling attracted to men. You don’t have to like men to like cocks. …
Marcela, thank you pointing that out (so to speak). It is not something that some cis folks have difficulty comprehending.
That describes me fairly well. I am a cis man who loves women (and am happily married to one; I am also lucky as you said). However, since sometime in my teenage years, I have leaned toward anal sex – always with women – both giving and receiving, plus lots of solo receiving. It took 20+ years for my anal “orientation” to become fully clear to me; I sure wish I had many years earlier more clearly understood my “orientation”. Then it took another 30 years of evolution of my interest and development my now-significant receiving capability to get to where I am now. Now I could not imagine anything else. If only time travel were possible so that I could go back 50 years and tell my young self about what I know now.
As I like to joke “it is rare, but happens frequently”. Gender and sexuality if continuum in everyone lives. It changes and evolved continuously. Noone is the same their whole lives.
Since as I remember I liked anal. I discovered and as soon as I discovered playing with myself. Sometimes it was confusing, sometimes I thought I was a gay male, sometimes I was just fine. And as you it took me a long while to understand myself and I also would like a time machine. If you find one let me know. Lil Marcelo from the past needs a masterclass on growing up
See, my first contact with the concept af anal sex was very different.
I read a book on female sexuality from 1976 and there was this whole chapter on anal sex. I remember, as a 15 year old boy, how I then started fantasizing about having a girl who would allow me to fuck her asshole. While her pussy was right next to it.
I had to wait 35 years to finally find that girl, though. And she even wanted to go anal only with me soon in the relationship. We’re 4 years anal only now in our 4,5 year together.
I love hearing about people’s love of anal and their journeys too! My first time with anal was bad, not the terrible trauma that some people go through, but just embarrassing. As I’ve described elsewhere, it made anal sex a kind of “forbidden fruit” for me that I was determined to conquer. I guess I’m just stubborn that way. But sometimes I get self-conscious about my desire for anal play, and the reasons I may or may not be drawn to it. Philosophers tend to overthink, I guess.
Anyways, to hear about people who know they love anal sex from the start, and pursue it over the course of their lifetimes, really helps me come to terms with my own desires as well. So thank you all!
Welcome to the group, Marcela! Stories like yours make my world more vibrant and colorful, thanks for sharing it. It really warms my heart when someone finds true happiness simply by breaking silly rules.
