As I get older (I’m 40), I find I am interested in a person’s ass and not really their genitals. In that sense I have no preference for women or men… I independently came up with the word “analsexual” but I’ve seen other people use it.
I have never been with a woman because I found it much easier to find gay bottoms. I’ve always had a thing for butts since I was a child. Asses are inherently provocative, forbidden, shapely, sensitive, erogenous, grab-able, and so on. There’s something about how they sort of stare at you when a person’s back is turned, almost silently taking on a personality of their own.
I remember when I learned you could actually fuck an ass, it took the sexual aspect of it from abstract to actionable. I love the idea of a guy in chastity and their sexual pleasure restricted to anal.
I self-identified as “gay” but it felt more like an identity choice than an accurate description; I like the female figure and jerk off to straight anal porn all the time. The one thing that unifies my pornographic preferences is someone has to get fucked in the ass. I don’t really know how to approach a woman and tell her I only want anal, they will probably think I’m weird – and maybe they’re right. There probably aren’t a lot of e.g. dating profiles where women would spell that preference out because it probably attracts weirdos? idk. I honestly don’t know a lot about girls! Regardless, I think I could be very happy in a relationship with an anal-oriented woman, it’s just not something I deliberately pursue. I briefly had a partner (man) who would have orgasms from getting fucked in the ass, I still miss that.
Not sure if there are other guys like me who just like ass regardless of sex, or women who don’t think a person like me is creepy/gross. Just wanted to share my brief bio and how my ass-obsessed mind works.
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WELCOME!
“I resemble that remark.” While I am a straight man and don’t feel attraction to other men in preference, and I have never been with a man, when I watch porn it does not really matter to me who (what gender) is getting fucked… as long as they are getting fucked in the ass.
Absolutely there are other men who feel as you do. I feel that way even though I have never been with a man. And absolutely there are women to don’t think a person (of any gender) with those feelings is “creepy/gross”.
I have wondered what I would do if my wife died (or if she dumped me for a better looking man) in regard to dating and seeking future relationships. It is not a big concern for me, but as we all know, bad s–t happens sometimes. Though I know I am attracted to women, knowing what I know now about myself, I really don’t think I would bother trying to seek or have a relationship with a women unless I knew she was anal-oriented herself. (But others on this forum have expressed their opinion that it is extremely hard to find such women.)
Likebutts… I am glad you have joined the forum. Please feel free to share your experiences and perspectives.
P.S. I have a hint for you: 40 is NOT “getting older”. IMHO… In 25 years you can begin to talk about “getting older”. Right now, at 40, you (generically speaking; I don’t know YOU of course) are just rounding the corner to a life less-hindered by all the crap that came with growing up and figuring out who you are. At least that’s my perspective after having another 25+ years on you. It just keeps getting better from 40 (until your body starts falling apart, but that’s a long time off).
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Welcome to the forum!
Just to give my perspective, I think for me it would depend a lot on the guy. I think it would be really easy for a guy to say “I only fuck asses” at the start of a relationship and come off as a complete creep. But if we got to know each other first, maybe went on a couple of dates, and then he told me his preferences as part of an open conversation as our relationship develops, then I don’t think it would come off as creepy. But I might be in the minority, I could see a lot of girls taking it the wrong way.
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There was a time that I got really confused by my obvious preference for anal sex. Long before I knew anal only was a thing, I fantasized about an “anal exclusive” dynamic in which the pussy got fully ignored for penetrative sex.
My two previous wives were very fond of having their pussy fucked. It was the absolute main course, while anal was an extra. With my second wife, who was much more into anal, I tried to subtily turn it around and make anal the main course. Which seemed to work until she told me I had to be a closet gay for wanting so much anal.
So after divorcing her I was in a state of confusion
- Am I really the weird guy ?
- Is a hetero woman even for me ?
- Men don’t attract me, but pure anal sex does
- So maybe I should be with a woman who has no choice of being anal exclusive.
So at that point in my life I started wondering if a trans woman was what I needed. Really been wondering about that a lot. No possibility to be oriented on anything but her asshole and mouth. Still the thing was, that in trans porn the cock bothered me unless it was small and always limp.
But many of those trans women in porn had bigger cocks then I did and they got very hard while being assfucked. This was a huge turnoff for me, so the whole “maybe a trans woman” wasn’t the right path either.
Now I am so glad I kept being patient to meet the right woman. Cause I honestly would never have believed I would one day live the life I currently do. My wife is a unicorn, she’s the woman that didn’t exist. She makes my life amazing. Plus the sheer power of looking at her resting, unused, pussy while I assfuck her, is the absolute dream come true.
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Anal only and a small limp penis is a key to a man’s heart (or at least to his pants). You should’ve gave it a try.
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Read my last part again. I’m that man that is proud of not having many sexual partners.
Thanks for the replies, it’s good to get some perspectives from different people.
Funnily enough I did once see a what looked like a genuine post on a doublelist from a woman who wanted someone for just anal. I wanted to reply, but I was too bashful? I think there’s some kind of mental barrier there for me, like I’m subjecting a nice girl to my own bullshit, or putting them in the middle of my own experiment or something. Maybe with men anal seems less imposing because I see us as less inhibited and lustful, with women I have this almost guilty thought process that they deserve someone better or something like that. The more I reflect on this the more confused I am actually lol, maybe I might have problems to work out haha
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And ???
Though I have not been in the dating world for longer than the majority of the human population on the planet has been alive, it seems to me that what you are concerned about something that is just “normal” for any kind of dating relationship.
I enjoy reading the articles that generally have titles like “25 horrible dating experiences reported by … [men / women]”. Telling a date (either before a date or during a date, perhaps after a couple of dates) that [the person doing the telling] is interested in anal sex… and how does [the other person] feel about anal sex? … is really tame compared to most of the stories in those articles.
If it is something you want to do, go ahead and do it. Nobody can do it for you. The other person involved is a grown-up and knows (or should know) how to say either “yes please” or “no thanks”.
One of my all-time favorite tee-shirts says “I can explain it to you, but I can’t understand it for you.” That sort of applies in this general subject.
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I’ve heard Russian women are much into anal. And you can never know what’s true about that. Then I’ve started a relationship with a Russian woman and waddayouknow ? After only 6 weeks she asks me if I wanted to use her other hole. Her ex had had anal sex with her all the time and also with every woman before her.
Because Russian men tell women on the first date they’re going to assfuck them later that night. Giving her two clear choices. Go home alone or go with him and get her ass fucked.
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