Would I admit it in real life? That is going to depend on who I’m talking to. I have a friend I’ve told all my sexual story to up until I delved into anal, and if it comes up, I’ll probably tell. That friend won’t freak out about it outside of potential health concerns (like anal fissures and the like) but we will definitely be able to have a solid discussion about it if it does. Maaaaaybe one or two other select friends if they seem open to it, but that would be it.
And I’m going to echo some of what a couple other people said - talking openly with your children about sex is the way to go. Don’t invite them into your bedroom with details, but like, normalizing the discussion of it and teaching proper terms for things is best. I don’t know that I’d introduce anal like it is here, because I agree with whoever said you should let them discover their preferences on their own, but if it came up, I’d discuss it. And also best research practices and always encouraging research so they don’t just jump into things blindly but do due diligence.
Funnily enough we didn’t discuss my anal exploits with my parents and grandparents at Christmas dinner. The topic never came up! My sister knows though and she was trying to subtly drop it into conversations. Cow! Mind you she had anal with her boyfriend and loves it!!
In couple of online forums (this site of course, fetlife and one local site) I’m totally open about it. In real lif few previous partnes have known and just about two years ago the topic came up with one good friend of mine and he has similar taste. so it’s good to know people in real life too that you can talk to about the subject.
When I was young I had some good discussions about sexuality with my mom and the way she brought up anal has ever since made me think that she might have liked it too very much.
I think I was already something like 19-20 and been dating this girl sometime. My mom then asked if we had already been intimate and about protection and such and then suddenly out of the blue she dropped the question if I already tried anal. And the way she smiled after that was like ”go ahead and do it, you’ll love it”.
With respect to discussions with children, I believe it’s much more important to discuss healthy relationships. A healthy relationship is a precursor to a satisfying sexual relationship.
There are so many toxic relationships within both our families that some of our family members are willing to share information about their lack of sexual relations.
We are both libertarians who believe people should engage in anything that makes them happy as long as it involves consenting adults. I would never advise anyone to consider a particular sexual act over another. We prefer anal to the extent we’re anal only, but others don’t find it pleasant at all.
As a product of the 60’s and 70’s, my motto is “if it feels good, do it”.
Discuss and model healthy relationships for your children. The amount of time and energy I’ve lost stuck in horrible relationships, romantic and otherwise, trying to fix them …
Children ideally need to learn two things: What personal boundaries are (others have them and they are to be respected, and that they set, communicate and enforce their own), and how to find out what their own boundaries should be. What feels good and proper for them?
As for bmasteri’s mother, if she could advice him on what else to try in bed, and he remembers it as a positive thing, I think good boundaries were in place.
Its something I’d like for her to discover herself and knowing her if I suggested it she would do the opposite. I had a word in her boyfriend’s ear as I’ve known him for years.
so it’s good to know people in real life too that you can talk to about the subject.