Hello, everyone. I am single now, but I have had two long term relationships from which I could have as much anal as I wanted, but lately (it’s been a year I’m single), I have been facing this fear of never getting that again, also the fear of being clear with a possible partner about my likes concerning sex. I know there are many women who say they love anal and they could not live without it, but what if these are the ones who are no longer available? What If I never get to feel that type of pleasure again, and how can I approach a “candidate”, because let’s agree that anal as the main course still sounds weird for some, and I could not be happy with it only on monthly basis or something. I would also never go back to fucking only pussies, I couldn’t do that.
How did you men approach the women? For the ladies, how did your partner get you to do be anal only or a regular anal partner?
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As a couple that started anal decades into our relationship, I finally took the time to show how she can experience anal pleasure. Patience is required. She swore my cock would never penetrate her ass despite dozens of attempts over the years.
Lots of rimming, fingering her ass, and rubbing her clit so she associates a pleasure she’s familiar with anal pleasure. She discovered anal orgasms after she was able to take a decent size glass dildo. After 2 or 3 months, she was able to take me. She had an anal orgasm several minutes after I penetrated her.
Long story, but wouldn’t it be more satisfying if you could show a woman how her ass can give pleasure she’s never experienced before? You could become the anal whisperer. I regret I didn’t exercise the same patience sooner and she regrets not being more open minded earlier in our relationship. Creating your anal queen might produce better results than stumbling upon one.
What Colt said.
I think any dynamic in the bedroom has to be built by the people who experience it.
Also, think of it this way: Anal is never quite the same between two different couples. Compare Abbi and her boyfriend and Colt and his wife, just as easy examples. You don’t want anal, period, you want anal the way you and your future partner enjoy it together.
Make a connection (not a genital one) first, build trust, make sure you want to share your life with that person (in whatever capacity) and then introduce her to your obsession.
For many women, developing the trust to allow a man enter them anally, can take some time. It may require some patience and diplomacy. Rather than introducing it as a discussion topic at the dinner table, when enjoying intimacies, perhaps focus on her ass, stroking her butt cheeks with a finger making contact her anus and see her reaction. Then you might be able to progress to licking her anus. While she’s at the state of heightened arousal, maybe then suggest inserting yourself.
This is the strategy I adopted when trying to encourage my boyfriend to try anal on me. 18 months later, so glad he did!
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I believe this is about the most difficult question because there is no answer.
I never even knew anal only was a way of life. I knew I liked anal in my first marriage, but we seldom did it and when we did, it was awkward or she complained about pain. So it eventually stopped.
Second woman suggested anal herself and was more into doing it a few times a week. Still she was like 100% pussy oriented and anal was an extra gift I got. Not an obviousness. She never had pain.
But I had to meet my current woman to find someone who clearly loved anal. So even before finding the anal only life style, through the old forum, we triend anal exclusive october. That failed because I wanted to try ass to pussy.
Then december I found this forum and very spontanious we switched to the anal only lifestyle and have been ever since.
So I feel it’s something which happens to us, not something we can find/create.
Unless you find a submissive girl and turn her anal only as part of the dom/sub dynamic. That does happen.
Get out there, meet new people, you might be surprised with what you find. I’m 25yo and I have several girl friends who enjoy anal.
I think in a relationship, with a lot of conversation and all the tips the other member mentioned, you can find an AO partner.
Not all girls are sub / dom when it comes to anal. For me it was a desire I wanted to fulfilled. My boyfriend was was happy to join me on my journey as anal was fairly new to him also. Anal sex in one of the ways we express our love and trust with each other.
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Another contributor commented, “If the heart says yes, the ass says yes” which I think is true. Even a woman who may be open to the idea may not admit it early on in the relationship. Asking a woman to give you her ass before her heart is unreasonable in my opinion. Call me a romantic.
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I was the one who wrote this quote I once read.
At the time this quote had some impact on me, cause my then wife told me she wanted anal, but her asshole clenched tightly if I tried to penentrate her. Resulting in painal and I didn’t want that.
My fiancee now, has not experienced even discomfort since I assfuck her. Her ex gave her discomfort and pain. So I am super content that her heart says yes.
Confirmed, you were the one and I thank you my fellow romantic. The words were a relevation to me and I will never forget them.